Thursday, October 26, 2006

Wow Folks!

So Madonna was on Oprah yesterday and I am trying to figure out where she got an English accent. That chick is from Bay City, Mich. That's in America. I guess she bought her accent at the same place as Tina Turner.
Anyway, she told Oprah that her new baby's daddy understood everything before he signed the papers to allow Madonna to adopt his child. I believe that, I think that someone informed him of how rich Madonna is and that he may be able to get some money out of this and THAT AIN'T RIGHT!!!
I guess the thing that kind of bothers me is that the child was not with his father in the first place and now he is trying to hinder someone from adopting him now. That is selfish and I can not believe that he, as a father, would do something like that.
I think maybe he wanted Madonna and Guy to adopt him.
Naomi Campbell was arrested for assault on her drug counselor. Aren't people who are getting off drugs violent? Shouldn't this lady have been prepared for the occasional belligerent outburst? I'll bet Whitney's counselors got their eyes dotted a few times and we didn't hear anything about her getting arrested.
And I have to say something about that Rush Limbaugh. Now, everybody who has a YouTube account has seen the Michael J. Fox commercial and has seen that poor man twitching and rocking like he has tourettes.
A normal person would have looked at the ad and felt empathy or sympathy. This so and so looked at the ad and said the man was acting or he was off his medication.
Now if anybody knows what people act like who are OFF their meds, it is good ol' Rush. How long has he been off his meds? It was about three years ago when he finally admitted that he was on that stuff (oxycontin). I still think he's on something, but I haven't figured it out yet.
When I do, you'll be the first to know.

Monday, October 23, 2006

I can't be the ONLY sane person left.

I had a long, fun-filled weekend but of course, that does not mean that yours truly was out of the loop. It seems that the more I try to stay away from news, the more it tries to find me.
Now, nothing of newsworthiness happened to or around me while I was on the wonderful campus of North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University. But, as I have stated to so many others, people are just crazy.
A report surfaced today about an armed mad dad in Philly who pulled a gun on his child's football coach because he was not getting enough playing time. This man has to be nuts. This was a game for 6- and 7-year-olds, it was not the freakin' Super Bowl.
From what I understand in Pee Wee or Pop Warner football, the coaches play everybody on the team. Practices such as these build character and self-esteem. But this fool had to go 'gangsta' and pull a gun on the coach.
I thought Philly was supposed to be the city of brotherly love and sisterly affection. I AM NOT seeing the love there folks. I don't know why I'm telling you guys this, but the first thing that came to my mind is, "Lord, please don't let this be a negro."
I'm not saying that it was right, but the sniper thing threw everybody off.
And speaking of crazy negroes Wesley Snipes is not rushing to get back to America just because there's a warrant for his arrest.
News flash people!!!! Black men don't go TO warrants, they go AWAY from them. DUH!!!
According to reports, he's planning to stay until he finishes the horror movie he's working on. Yea right, there is no extradition agreement between Namibia and the U.S., so he can stay as long as he likes and nobody is going to touch him to take him back to America.
And to me, that sucks. He committed a crime and he should pay for it, in a regular prison. They should send his butt to Riker's Island and we'll all find out if he's Undisputed.
Former Enron CEO Skilling got 24 years in prison for the 2001 scandal. And guess what Tarheels, he's coming to N.C. Yep, he'll be at Butner. I think they should send him to Central Prison and throw him in lock up with the other criminals because he is a thief just like some of them are thieves. The difference is they may have stolen items, Enron execs stole people's lives and hope.
It has been reported that Skilling and his counterparts helped to dissolve more than $60 billion in Enron stock, $2 billion in pension plans and thousands of jobs. His real punishment ought to be getting locked in a room with about four big ole' burly men who spent the majority of lives working for Enron or one of their subsidiaries who were about a year or two away from retirement.
That would be all the punishment he needed. I tell you what would be janky - if he just up and died like Ken Lay did. I'm not wishing that on anyone, I'm just saying that it would be convenient, that's all.
And last and certainly not least, Madonna is heading to Oprah to tell her side of the adoption 'scandal.' What scandal? The Malawian kid's father is thinking of reversing the adoption and now people in Malawi feel like special privileges were given to Madonna to get this kid more quickly.
Well duh. That's what money does for you, it makes things move a lot faster. Now, she's going on Oprah, to discuss what I don't know, but I hope my girl asks her flat out why she didn't adopt an American black kid and see what she says.
But then again, she probably already has an answer for that too.

Friday, October 20, 2006

I Almost Forgot!!!

Wesley Snipes. Lord, Wesley Snipes.
They found this negro in Africa and somebody had a good eye too. At any rate, I think he should sue whoever in the freak told him that he could get away with not paying his taxes.
This is America people. Uncle Sam is going to get his cut no matter what happens. They allow celebrities and other folks with money to pay later because in theory, they will have the money. And the rest of us, they just take it up front because they KNOW we don't have it.
And in news from around the world, a prisoner in Australia took a bunch of laxatives so that he could lose enough weight to squeeze through a hole in a prison wall. The man spent three days on the run from police before he was caught.
I'm still laughing at this because I'm wondering how far he got if he had to stop every few minutes to find a bathroom. I guess this is a situation where everything didn't come out alright. LOL!!!
OK, I'm alright now.
There was a story on CNN about happy kids not being good at math and kids who are good at math are not happy. They had a poll and everything asking parents if they preferred their kids to be happy or good at math.
This is so wrong on so many different levels.
What parent doesn't want their kid to be happy and what parent doesn't want their kid to be good in math? The real story they should explore is why kids who are good in math are unhappy.
I have the answer, there is no more exploration needed.
Those kids are unhappy because they just sat through two hours of trying to do one algebra problem and they have missed Rap City and part of 106th and Park and they have a headache. The kids who aren't good at math are happy because they did not burst a brain vessel trying to figure out why x=-3.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Where to begin?

This has been an eventful week and it's only Wednesday!
First off, I would like to congratulate VH1 on the Hip Hop Honors show last night. Now, to all the people I may have offended with my BET post, watch the VH1 replay and you will see what I'm talking about when I say real hip hop. That show was good from start to fin.
Even the Beastie Boys, who I really wasn't into, were pretty good - it brought back a few memories from when my brothers kept shoving the music in my sister's and my faces. Thanks fellas!
Secondly, what is up with Mike Tyson? The man told the press that he was "very serious" about stepping into the ring with a female boxer.
(I have my head turned, looking out of the corner of my eye with my lips turned.) That's ludicrous
I think the original question was whether or not he would fight a woman. The first thing that came to my mind is, "hasn't he done that already?" Isn't fighting women one of the main reasons his first wife left him? (That's what she said.)
I am a fan of boxing and I love to see a good fight, but I just don't hardly think you can get a good male/female fight unless they are in a relationship and somebody has spent the light bill money.
But, if Ann Wolfe, or any other woman is crazy enough to get in the ring with Mikey, at least now we know she'll fight back.
Oh yea, and good news for about 10,000 central African refugees. It seems that America has decided to take them in after some of them have been in Tanzanian camps since 1972.
I'm sure that those refugees are all sitting around saying, "whoooo hooooooo!!! A full 34 years after I need you, you just drop in and help. Well thank you America."
The new "visitors," because I'm sure they plan to kick them out after a few years, are natives of Burundi. Just a little bit of background, the country is in Central Africa and has been going through civil war since getting independence from Belgium.
Now, I say that to say, I wonder what the ulterior motive is for bringing in "new" black people to America. America barely cares about the black folks we have now and they went to get new ones? Who knows, this could be some sort of trade. Basketball season is near. I think we should be on the look out for Manute Bol-like ball players.
Lookout, I think somebody's up to something.

Monday, October 16, 2006

FootBRAWL?!

Not hardly. Football players being football players is what I say.
It seems that everybody is talking about last weekend's game between Miami and Florida International. Maybe I'm a lil' delayed, but, I don't see why everybody is so upset.
Football is a brutal sport. It is meant to hurt. This is one of the only sports besides boxing where the athlete is rewarded for either giving or taking a "good hit."
From what I understand, the fight started after a Miami player pointed to the Florida International bench after scoring a touchdown. The score was 35-zip, you think Miami is not going to be talking junk and making fun of the losing team?
Please. I don't know a man who doesn't gloat when he's winning. This is simply a case of a sore loser. I mean did Florida International really expect to win? I sure hope not.
Miami is a Division I university in a tough conference that has the power to recruit the best players from around the country. They could have played their third string and still won the game. I do believe in miracles and I know that anything is possible, but Saturday wasn't Christmas and the Orange Bowl is not on 34th Street, I don't think.
The point is, the coaches and athletic directors should be the ones on the chopping block for setting up this David and Goliath style game. Any time colleges are that close together, there will always be some sort of rivalry where one school will think they are better than the other.
While I have not been in the atmosphere at either school, I am willing to bet my Homecoming money that Miami treated Florida International like a red-headed step-child.
That sort of conflict is going to breed some bitterness. Add to that a little testosterone and a few blows to the head at warp speed and you've got a bunch of belligerent guys who want to make somebody hurt.
And that is not unacceptable, that's good football.

Friday, October 13, 2006

I must be getting old!

I have to be getting old or mature or something. Yesterday, the nominees for the first BET Hip Hop Awards were announced in Atlanta and I am/was so not excited.
Am I the only person who sees a problem here?
Why is it necessary for BET to create another awards show? Are the BET Awards and that God-awful comedy awards show not enough? I thought Reginald Hudlin and Stephen Hill were supposed to be making improvements.
I wonder what that pitch meeting was like. "I think we should create an awards show just for hip hop. I know we already have the Source Awards and the Vibe Awards, but we should do something because we're BET!"
To have been a fly on the wall. I would pay them $1 million in $25 installments just to have said, "WRONG ANSWER!!!"
I can't even imagine Debra Lee sitting through two hours of iced out grillz and rented platinum and enjoying it.
But we all know she will be sitting there in her Versace gown with that pasted smile on her face and trying to use slang when she addresses the audience.
And what will be the categories? Worst acting by a rapper? Cutest video ho? How about best grill?
Spare me, please.
I wish somebody would have the courage and the gall to snatch up Bob Johnson and take him to a TV and turn on BET. Not only make him watch it, but smash his face in it (think the old school way of house breaking a dog), and say, look what you did!!! Bad Bob, Bad Bob!!!
The real problem I have with it is that they are billing it the "Hip Hop Awards." Ask yourself, does hip hop exist anymore? I personally think that there are very few artist who can still consider themselves hip hop artists.
Think about it.
When hip hop was originated, it had a message, it was the voice of suffering people in the inner cities. Think Grand Master Flash and the Furious Five here. Then it evolved into being fun. It was about having a good time. This is where you insert Doug E. Fresh and Slick Rick.
Now, critics and consumers alike are using the term loosely and interchangeably with manufactured rap artists. Think that G-Unit and all those 'Young' people, Joc and Dro and all of 'em.
This stuff ain't fun and it ain't got a message. What it is, is manufactured, dry shells of what used to be good music. When I hear hip hop being used to describe today's music, I get so irritated because this mess these kids are listening to today is not hip hop.
I haven't named it yet, but I will. You know I will.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

You gotta love politicians!!!

Wow is all I have to say about U.S. Rep. Christopher Shays comments about Freaky Foley. In case you haven't heard, Shays, most definitely a Republican, basically said 'nobody died' in this scandal. And apparently, he's serious.
If this does not motivate folks to get out and vote, I don't know what will. What I am trying to figure out is why Shays deemed it necessary to recall an incident that is nearly 30 years old to take up for his counterparts. Guess what man, this has nothing to do with what happened in 1969. It is 2006 and your boy is still a pedophile.
I guess in the eyes of Shays and all of his counterparts covering up for Foley, it's OK because no one was hurt. I say, bull crap. Who says no one has been hurt? What about the kids who were on the receiving end of those e-mails and IMs?
I say they lock the freak and his buddies in a room with these kids parents and see what happens. I'll bet somebody will be hurt then.
And why do we care that Madonna has adopted a Malawian kid? Every time I turn around, some celebrity is adopting some underprivileged, foreign kid.
I certainly don't have anything against adoption, but what's the matter with the underprivileged American kids? I think that foreign orphans are the new fashion accessory for celebrities.
I think it is high time somebody in the foster care/adoption system speaks out about this. I am pretty sure some of the kids caught up in the system would appreciate having wealthy parents.
And before I go, I have to say something about that bug-eyed "Runaway Bride." That heifer should have just kept running. Someone please explain to me why this chick has the man she jilted in court. And she's suing for a gold couch?
Who buys a gold couch?
The judge should laugh her up out of the courtroom for that reason alone. Other stuff listed in the suit is a new vacuum cleaner, a ladder and wedding shower gifts that she shouldn't have kept anyway.
This is the most frivolous law suit ever. If you ask me, everybody who gave them wedding shower gifts should be in the courtroom after that stuff is divided to sue for their toasters and towels and whatever else people give for wedding showers.

Monday, October 09, 2006

Guess who's back!!!!

It's been a minute but don't think it is because I ran out of opinions.
First off, let’s go ahead and get the obvious stuff out of the way. For the lack of a better term, what the freak is up with T.O.? I mean really, the man has a $25 million contract and all of a sudden he wants to commit suicide, write children's books and drop everything he's thrown all in the same week? Come on man!
Now, I'm a T.O. fan, always have been, but dude, it's time for you to stop playing, get to the business of catching the football and get you some Jesus! But not in that order.
And while we're discussing this, why is he making $25 million to catch a freakin' football anyway? Can we please stop throwing money at these spoiled athletes and start throwing money at our teachers and military personnel!!! I mean really.
Secondly, what is going on in Washington? D.C., I mean. What is up with Freaky Foley? Are you trying to tell me that there were not enough gay guys in D.C. for him to get with that he had to start making passes at pages? I don't buy it.
The last time I checked, D.C. was one of the gayest cities in America and I'm sure it hasn't changed since the last Capital Pride in June. From what my sources (my gay friends) tell me, D.C. is still as gay as it ever was. So I am trying to find out why it is Foley had a hard time getting some.
Honestly, I think he is calling himself a gay drunk so that he doesn't have to face the fact that he is a drunken, disgusting pedophile. I know plenty of gay guys, and most of them drink, but that has never led a single one to the playground to pick up dates.
But I digress.
Anyway, I hope everyone realizes that this whole Foley thing is a WMD (weapon of mass distraction) from what is really going on in the Middle East. While we're over here talking about Freaky Foley, somebody's son or daughter is over there dying for nothing more than Bush's ego.
That is the main reason that the N. Korean president decided to launch these nuclear weapons underground. Mr. Kim has crossed the proverbial line in the sand and now it is up to Hang 'Em High Bush to push him back.
I tell you people, I am afraid. Not of the nuclear weapons, afraid of how far Bush is going to take this. I hope ya'll realize that he doesn't have to leave the White House just because his term is up in 2008. That jackass can declare war in any of the countries that hate us and be there forever.
Jesus keep me near the cross!