Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas ...

From my family to yours, have a very happy and safe holiday season!

Happy Holidays

Here's a few tunes to help you through your day today. Remember to pause the regular playlist on the right before you start to play this one.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

There's no crying in basketball ...

I guess there is.

In case you didn't watch the video, Glen "Big Baby" Davis proved that he has his nickname for a reason. That dude stomped off to his corner, started crying and threw his towel after hearing some "harsh" words from Kevin Garnett.
Note to KG, "Nobody puts Baby in a corner!"

I thought nothing would would be worse than seeing Terrell Owens cry last year after the scrutiny his quarterback, Tony Romo, faced last year after losing in the first round of the playoffs when he returned from a Mexican vackay with his Space Cadet girlfriend Jessica Simpson.

This though has taken the cake, the ice cream and the damn cherry on top! Crying over some "harsh words" from a teammate? What's next, bitching to the coach that nobody will pass him the ball?
I'm sorry, I just have a thing for overly sensitive men. I can't respect 'em, I never have. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that men should never cry, I'm saying they shouldn't cry about everything. Hell, women shouldn't cry about everything, it has never solved a single problem in your adult life.
When you're a child, you cry when you get upset about something because you can't effectively articulate your feelings. When you're an adult, you cry as a means to show hurt, regret or frustration. Go ahead and argue that Davis was crying out of frustration and I'll argue that his work is called a game and games are supposed to be fun. How many people find work fun?
Since this can be a little confusing, I'll give you a couple of scenarios where crying is acceptable and when it's not.

Cry when:
*you're laughing just that hard
* you're moved by the Holy Spirit
* there's a death of a relative, friend and a pet that you've had more than five years
* you're too broke to pay attention
* Duke Power has turned off your lights and you're about to lose the house
* you get divorced.
* your children are born or there are other major events like graduations and YOUR or your daughter's wedding.
By all means, have at it. Cry, "take your soul to the laundromat" like Lyfe Jennings said.

Do not cry when:
* you get reprimanded at work
*you get criticized
* your team loses a big game
* it is your child's first day of school
* you are in the middle of an argument
* you see a touching movie
* there is something frivolous involved
Honestly, how many more of these dudes do we need?

I'm gonna tell you now, if a dude comes to me crying about nothing, I am subject to laugh in his face and leave him all on the same day. If he's the one crying, when do I have time to be emotional? How is he going to comfort me, with his sensitive ass?!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

In the spirit of Christmas ...

Check out the video I made of my siblings and I with my dad.

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Monday, December 15, 2008

What do you think?

Everyone is up in arms about SNL's latest skit poking fun at New York Governor David Paterson. I don't normally poke fun at the handi-capable but this skit was hilarious.

First off, Paterson is one of the smartest people in politics. He is also one of the funniest because he is the only dude I have ever known to admit to having extramarital affairs and being a coke head while in office. Now, folks are all pissed off because he's blind.

If he had 20/20 vision, we would have been falling over laughing at that skit. Take a look:

I thought handi-capable people wanted to be treated like everyone else. With that comes being made fun of just like everybody else. Truth be told, I think they laugh at us behind our backs.
But I guess we'll never know, unless somebody writes a mov-. Let me get back to ya'll on this one.

Monday, December 08, 2008

I'm lovin' it!

So, in the past few weeks, everyone I know has been trippin' hard off the new McDonald's "McNugget Lovin'" commercial.

I think it's funny because at first, I, like a lot of others, thought, "who is this?" Then I saw that the dude was singing about some dang chicken nuggets. My first reaction was to laugh at the fact that I thought it was a new song, my second reaction was to laugh at the actual commercial looking like an R&B video.
Now, everybody's all upset. Those extra militant folks are threatening to boycott Mickey D's because they seem to think that every time a black person is in a commercial for them, they are either singing, dancing or playing a sport.
While there is a lot of evidence to support that:

I think the commercial is funny as crap.
It's just a commercial, nobody is looking to McDonald's to better the image of black folks. I think these are the people who look for racism everywhere. I don't know why everybody's acting like this is the first time Mickey D's has done a commercial catered to the black community.
I remember a commercial with some black kids jumping double dutch back in the day and what about that series of commercials starring Calvin who got the job at McDonald's?
Get a grip people! And just to show you guys that there are no hard feelings, enjoy this song from Dwele.

Thursday, December 04, 2008

Must See TV

I know that it is no secret that I watch a lot of television. I have to put you guys up on a great new series on my new favorite channel TV One.
First off, they've got all the great reruns of some of my favorite shows like "Martin," "Living Single," "Good Times" and "Roc." They also play some great movies starring wonderful black actors of the past and present.
In addition to all of that, they manage to put on awesome shows like their latest series, "Unsung." Let me just go on record as saying this is the best musical documentary series I have ever seen. Don't get me wrong, I like "Behind the Music" and all, but these shows are just better to me.

The title says it all, they are highlighting the careers and lives of some of the most unsung artists in music. From what I gather from the website and the shows, there are four episodes thus far. The first was about the incomparable Clark Sisters from music mecca Detroit.
I did a post during Black Music Month talking about how much their music has really touched me in my life. Being a fan< I only saw what was on the surface< I had no idea that they had such a fascinating story.
Of course I knew their historic gospel music lineage through their mother, Mattie Moss Clark, and I knew that they'd split to work on solo projects. I had no idea about all the things they endured just to get the music out.
In fact, the same can be said for Donny Hathaway and DeBarge. Their episodes came on Tuesday and Wednesday respectively. If you guys have TV One in your area, I strongly encourage you to watch these shows. I hope they make it apart of the weekly line-up, I would love to see stories on The O'Jays, Teddy Pendergrass, Stevie Wonder, Marvin Gaye, Babyface and so many others..

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Sometimes I Wonder ...

Sometimes I wonder about …

Why do some athletes think they are above the law?

How stupid do you have to be to shoot yourself in the leg?

Do athletes care how much they hurt the team?

Do they really deserve to make that much money?

Can you really call it work when it’s called a game?

How come teachers aren’t making 1/10 of what some of these athletes are making?

Did you know that the minimum salary for a rookie in the NFL is $295K and $398,762 for the NBA?

Holiday Shopping

Why do people lose their minds over Black Friday sales?

Is it really so serious that people should be getting trampled to death for a $97 GPS?

Shouldn’t we be pissed if they sell an HD flat screen TV for $1,499 all year and they turn around and sell it for $799?

Why do people get pissed at the retail salespeople when they run out of the stuff you want?

Don’t you think if they had it that it would be on the floor?

Why do I get a flashback of my Kmart job every time November rolls around?

Why do I feel like if I see this one lady who cursed me out because we put her lay-a-way back on the floor that I will beat her down?


How come it is easier to find weight than it is to lose it?

Why is it that I feel better when I see people in the gym who are bigger than I am?

Why are the personal trainers always cute until they make you excrete 12 gallons of sweat?

How come I touch the areas on my body that I know are sore from my workout?

Should I be that happy that I’m not that big or should I just keep my eyes on my own workout?

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

It's been nearly three weeks ...

... since I posted last and I'm not even going to give you an explanation. I will say that a lot has happened since I posted last so let's get right down to it.

First off, did you all have the opportunity to catch any of the episodes of "The Real Housewives of Atlanta?" I hope so. I don't often get sucked into reality TV but this was too good to pass up.

L to R: Lisa Wu Hartwell, Deshawn Snow, Kim Zolciak, Nene Leakes and Sheree Whitfield

Ya'll, this show has everything I enjoy in a TV show - comedy, drama, a villain - you name it, it's in the show.

For those of you who don't know, this is the latest installment of Bravo's "The Real Housewives ..." series. Bravo just premiered the fourth season of "The Real Housewives of Orange County" and they had an installment of The Real Housewives of New York."

Much like many TV shows, there was not much, if any, representation of African Americans on Bravo's original programming. So of course when they extended the series to ATL, you know the majority of them were going to be of the African American persuasion.

Anyway, this is the best reality TV show I have seen since the second season of "The Real World." I love it and I loved the reunion show even more. I don't know who cast this show but they did an outstanding job of it.
I will so be waiting for next season because this show made Tuesday nights worth turning on the TV. It also made me thankful for my situation. So, as a treat to you for being gone so long, here's a clip from the show.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

Obama - The Movie

So, last night, a friend and I were talking about the fact that there has to be a movie about President-Elect Barack Obama's life coming out.

We're not sure when, we don't know who would do it, but I thought why shouldn't I cast the movie and post it here for you guys to weigh in?

I have chosen several people who I think would fit certain parts. I am going to show you a split screen photo of the actor along with the person I want them to play and I'll give my reasons. Keep in mind that this is simply my opinion of what I would like to see and who I would like to see. The comment section is for you all to weigh in or to give your suggestions of who would make the better actor for the role. A'ight?

OK. First of all, this movie has got to be a Spike Lee Joint. Nothing would do my heart better than to see opening credits that read, "40 Acres and a Mule Filmworks" and "OBAMA" in all caps.

Barack Obama

That handsome brother on the left is Roger Guenveur Smith. I know you've seen him in several Spike Lee Joints including "Do the Right Thing," "School Daze," "Malcolm X" and others. The thing I remember him for most though is his one-man show "A Huey P. Newton Story," in which he wrote and starred. That too was directed by Spike Lee.

The man to the right of that needs no introduction as every person in the free world who has eyes can identify him. That is none other than Will Smith. We all know his work "The Pursuit of Happyness," "Ali," "Independence Day" and of course the list goes on and on.

Either of them would work because they are both phenomenal actors. Obviously, Roger Smith fits the part because he looks the part with the light skin. Will Smith also fits the part because he has the ears for it.

I think that Evan Ross should be tapped to play a young Obama. He's becoming a good actor and I think he could probably fit the part, after he's had a tan. What do you think?

Michelle Obama

Ladies and gentlemen, Gabrielle Union. *applause* I like her, she's pretty, she's confident and I think she could pull this off. I think she can be aged to show Michelle getting older.

Malia and Sasha

OK, of course there aren't many children of color on television and in movies, but I picked these two because I think they can pull off the parts.

On the left is China Anne McClain, she starred in Tyler Perry's Daddy's Little Girls and she is perhaps best known as Jazmin on Tyler Perry's House of Payne. She is feisty and sometimes too grown for her own good, but I think she'd make a perfect Sasha, that's the baby girl who loves the camera.

The little diva on the right is Willow Smith, Will and Jada's baby. She seems to have a lot of personality with her too, but I think that she's a little older than China and I think that they would be the perfect ones to play the small roles.

Barack's Parents
I think Jane Krakowski and Djimon Hounsou would be the best actors to play his parents. When I saw the picture of Obama as a child sitting on the fence with his mother supporting his back, I immediately thought of the "Ally McBeal" actress.

I think they look a lot alike and Krakowski has that wide-eyed innocence that his mother has in all the pictures I've seen of her. And Hounsou looks like he could be the stern man Obama wrote about in his book "Dreams From My Father."
Shoot, put some Malcolm X glasses on that brother and make him put on his serious face and I'll bet he'll look like Obama Sr.
To me, Hounsou and Obama Sr., share a lot of the same facial features and they both have smiles that look like they light up the room. Now I can't tell by the picture what Obama Sr., really looks like but I know Hounsou is a gorgeous man and if Obama Sr., made Obama II, he had to be a handsome feller in his own right.

Stanley and Madelyn Dunham (Obama's grandparents)

I happen to think that Robert Duval and Sharon Gless from TV's "Cagney and Lacey" would be great as his grandparents.

Not really hearing a lot about his grandparents in the media, I am going solely on looks and acting ability. In his book, I read that his grandparents were his rock and the people he looked up to for a lot of his wisdom and well, don't they look wise to you?

Maya Soetoro-Ng (his sister)

When I saw his sister, I thought that the only person who could possibly play her is Thandie Newton. These two look so much alike and Newton is a great actress. You guys probably remember her as Terrance Howard's wife on "Crash." She also has a major role in this year's movie "W" as Condoleeza Rice. I know, she looks nothing like her, but that is neither here nor there.

Joe Biden

I think Will Ferrell will make the best Joe Biden in Hollywood. First off, I know Ferrell is a comedic actor, but Biden is one funny dude. I had the opportunity to observe him at a rally earlier this year.
He says exactly what's on his mind and I think that Ferrell is probably like that at home. Plus, they both have that same crooked smile that looks like, "I just farted."
Everyone else, I just post their names and pictures and you can tell me what you thing, OK?

Brian Dennehy as John McCain

Tina Fey or Megan Mullally as Sarah Palin

Glenn Close as Hillary Clinton

Eric Dane as Bill Clinton

Paula Newsome as Oprah Winfrey

Jeffrey Wright as Jeremiah Wright

Who did I miss and what do you think of my picks for the characters?

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

America the Beautiful

It is indeed a wonderful day to be an American. It is an even better one to be a black American. I'm feeling so good, I'm downright speechless. Imagine that, Smarty Jones, speechless. Who woulda thunk it?
At any rate, enjoy the sounds of the late great Ray Charles in his rendition of "America the Beautiful." Oh how beautiful she is.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Somebody, help me ...

... my computer has crashed and I can't do anything with it. I've done everything I know how to do and I can't get it back.
It's all good though, Poindexter gave me seven good years and I can't be mad that he finally tapped out. The only thing is I am currently looking for a new computer and my money is funny and my credit ain't gon' get it.
My dad has offered to help a sista out and ya'll know me, if my daddy says he's got it, I'm gonna let him have it.
At any rate, it seems my October has been an all around crappy month and I don't know about you guys but I'm glad it's pratically over. Now, I get to ease on into the holiday season and it's my favorite time of year.
I can say that something good did come out of this month. I think my faith in the music video is slowly being restored.
As a kid, I was a music video fanatic. But it's sad to say that the Wreckx-N-Effect "Rump Shaker" video started the slow spiral to hell for the music video.
Don't get me wrong, there have been some bright spots like TLC's "Waterfalls," Dr. Dre's "Been There, Done That," Aaliyah's "Are You That Somebody" and Outkast's "Hey Ya." But let's face it, the majority of the videos that I like to watch, R&B and some Hip Hop, feature scantily clad females shakin' what their mamas gave them in the cameras.
Back to the point, this month, I had the privilege of seeing Anthony Hamilton's "Cool" and Beyonce's "Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)" videos.
In case you guys haven't noticed, I tend to like simple videos with story lines and off the hook dancing.
I love Hamilton's story line and all the wonderful Southern imagery and I love how Beyonce channeled her "inner Anna Mae Bullock."
These videos are the epitome of what I like.
Have a look for yourself:

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

(Sound) tracks of my tears ...

I'm going to do something I rarely do and that is put myself out here.
I had every intention of posting my Top 10 Celebrity CGI list but I had a minor set back over the weekend that has taken me back to some old school New Edition.
First off, I've pretty much been dealing with the same dude since the 10th grade. I know, that's a hot minute, right? Anyway, we dated in high school, it didn't work out but we remained great friends.
The problem is, we crossed a line a couple of years back and we can never go back. Since we crossed that line, I have been slippin' on my pimpin'. At no time have we ever discussed having a relationship. We simply had an understanding, "I ain't messin' with nobody else and you ain't either."
That has worked for the most part, but of course that pretty much leaves me stuck out in the abyss of free booty without a net. Because there is no relationship, of course dude didn't feel obligated to participate in outings and social functions.
Don't get me wrong, we went out from time to time, but it has always been a spur of the moment, any time something is planned, he doesn't show up and that's enough to piss you off.
Long story short, I pretty much promised myself that he had "one mo' time" and I was done. Well, he used up his "one mo'" on Saturday night. He's been on the way since about 9:30 p.m., Saturday. I still haven't heard from him. No phone call, text message, not even a damn e-card. But it's cool.
Honestly, I don't/didn't have any real feelings toward this current situation. I guess I kind of expected him not to show up. I just think it's kind of jacked up that he didn't call to tell me he wasn't coming.
Long story short, I played myself and I've learned my lesson.
Oh well, so ends another era of my young life. My friends would tell you that it's time. I'm not so sure. To be honest, it's love, it always has been and I guess that's what's made it hard to let go.
But now, I'm drained, I'm tired and to quote Mary J., "I've done enough cryin', cryin', cryin'. It's time to say bye, bye, bye, it's time I do something for me!"

Thursday, October 16, 2008

OK, I'm back now ...

... I know I've took an unofficial hiatus and I'm sorry for that, but a sista has been stretched out like the dog on the Greyhound bus.
And add to that the fact that my beloved alma mater celebrated homecoming last week. Long story short, we got slaughtered on the football field, but a good time was had by all anyway.
Of course there are pictures but they are all of the WNAA-FM soundstage where I spent most of the day working on Saturday. Oh, there aren't any of me because I spent the day behind the camera.

With all of this said, of course I've got a post coming for ya'll, I just don't have time to do it all right now. Check back early in the "morn-ting" and I'll have my Top 10 CGI list.

Friday, October 03, 2008

High School High

So, I was having a conversation with Eb the Celeb while we were watching football last week and we started talking about how this whole blog world is like high school.
You got your smart kids, your weird kids, your crazy kids, your jocks and folks beefin' over crazy stuff and prominent cliques. It doesn't matter where you grew up, which state, region, that was your high school experience.

With all that said, I have a question for you guys. If the blogosphere were a high school and we're all seniors, what would be your superlative ("most likely to ..." or "best ...") and describe your clique.
Now, keep it cordial, civil or whatever you want to call it. This is something that I did out of fun just to get you guy's reaction about how you see yourself in this parallel universe I'm calling Blogger High.
With that said, I vote myself Class Clown because we all know that my randomness is funny as crap. Well, it's funny to me. I also vote myself most likely to get fired for bursting into hysterical laughter while reading blogs at work.
Your turn!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Sometimes I Wonder ...

The Emmys Edition …

• Who in the hell told Laurence Fishburne it would be a good idea to wear that god-awful blazer?

• Why did they get Josh Groban to sing that bi-polar, schizophrenic medley of TV theme songs?

• Wouldn’t it have worked better with the cast of American Idol?

• What was with the opening by the reality hosts?

• Wouldn’t it have been better if Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart and Steve Carell hosted?

• Am I the only one who wishes Tina Fey would have accepted one of her awards as Sarah Palin?

• How come the only black person I saw on stage accepting an award was Glynn Turman?

• Can we please hurry up and get some quality shows with minorities in them on television please?

OK, now, I’ve heard it all.

No, for real, I have. This morning, I received an e-mail from a co-worker that says that Bishop Thomas Weeks is looking for love on the World Wide Web.
According to, Weeks launched his online search via his web site. Weeks has posted a video to his web site asking what kind of advice his followers and fans would give him about his third wife.
"I'm sure there are some of you that would like to just share your personal heartfelt [thoughts] of what you would say to either Mrs. Weeks in the future, or to myself about Mrs. Weeks."
In case you all forgot, Weeks is the former husband of Prophetess Juanita Bynum, a gospel singer and televangelist. Critics and church folk alike have accused Bynum of exploiting this incident of domestic violence for financial gain. I’m not going to address that because if she is, she won’t prosper.
I blogged about this incident a little over a year ago when it happened. Since then, Weeks pleaded guilty to attacking Bynum in the parking lot of Renaissance Concourse Hotel and has been sentenced to three years probation, 200 hours of community service and anger management. The official charge was aggravated assault.
Fast forward to last Friday, the story surfaced that he’s been posting these webisodes in search of his next wife.
What’s even more laughable than that, there are a few takers. I’m not sure how many, but I hope they fit his criteria of being “someone who can bear children, is sensual and can't be ugly.”
Now, I have no words for him, but for the next Mrs. Weeks, whoever this poor woman may be, take a few kick boxing classes. Hell, take kickboxing, Karate, Tae Kwon Do and some good ol’ fashioned self-defense classes. I say that because the man does have a track record of beating a woman down and being verbally abusive.
Around the time all of this came out, former secretaries and other women in the congregation came forward saying he’d been verbally abusive and we all know that’s how it starts.
At any rate, I hope everything works out for him and his new punching bag, I mean, wife.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

I'm Gettin' Grown ...

I got a phone call from a high school boyfriend who told me that it is time to start locating our classmates for our 10-year reunion. I said, "dayum, has it been that long already?"
Apparently it has. After that phone call, I started thinking back, reminiscing, if you will. We graduated from Fairmont High School May 26, 2000. And to me, that doesn't seem that long ago. I just realized, I now fit into that 26 to 30 age bracket and that is a trip to me.
Those four years of high school were filled with games, clubs, JROTC drill meets and a whole lot of other activities.
I could have been labeled as somewhat of an overachiever while in high school. I had decent grades, mostly A's and B's. I played varsity basketball for three years, threw shot and discus on the track team, played in the marching band for all four years, concert band for three years. I was also one of the the top cadets in JROTC, I was the drill team commander for two years, participated in several clubs and like most southern teens, I was heavily involved at church.
I graduated from high school with honors and headed off to Aggie Land, that's N.C. A&T for those of you who don't know, and kyle. I swear, all of that feels like just yesterday, then again, it feels like it was decades ago. I don't know about you guys, but my life has changed drastically since high school.
Since then, I've graduated from college, changed jobs and addresses about four times. I've been in more weddings and bought more ugly dresses than I care to remember and a lot of my friends are now parents.
The thing that has changed most in my life is probably the fact that my priorities have changed. While I still don't have the husband and family to worry about I do have to take care of myself.
When I was 18, I was into everything pop culture and entertainment. I was never the club type chick but I could tell you any and everything about whatever artist was hot and where they were going to be. Shoot, back then, if I was having a cash flow problem, I would just call my daddy.
Now, I can't tell you anything about anybody who is hot right now. All I know about commercial radio is it sounds like noise and Plies and Lil' Wayne are dominating the airwaves. And now, if I am running low on cash, I just gotta wait until pay day.
Man, life was sweet! Why the hell did I have to grow up? And why has it been so long since I was a kid?
I feel like I just moved out of my parents house and like I just graduated. I swear ya'll, I have no idea where the last eight years of my life have gone.
I'll be around 27 or 28 when my classmates decide to gather and lie about what we've been doing with our lives. That means I am knocking on the door to 30 and I'm not that happy about it.
While I am looking forward to my 30s, there's still so much I haven't done, so many goals I have yet to accomplish. I gotta get crackin'!
Oh well, here's a song for the road.
"... la la la la laaaaaa, la la la la la laaaaaaa ..."

Sunday, September 14, 2008

And they're off ...

... gas prices have again made the trek upward again this weekend.
I gassed up my car on Thursday night for $3.59/gallon and packed my clothes in anticipation of driving down to the Queen City (Charlotte, NC) to see my best friend, my goddaughter and my brand new godson this weekend.
I got up Friday, finished up my stories for the week and jumped on the highway only to find that gas had gone up as much as a dollar in some places overnight. To add injury to insult, some gas stations were limiting drivers to only 10 gallons.
What does that have to do with me since my tank was already full, you may ask? Well, I could get down there, but getting back would be a different story. I could go, but I would run the risk of spending $50 to $60 to fill my tank when I got back and another $40 when I got home for the week. I don't know about ya'll but I don't have it like that.
Long story short, I opted not to head to the QC and went to the movies to see "Tyler Perry's The Family That Preys." And I must say to all of you I was presently surprised. Honestly, I don't know what I expected, but it was a good film. Trust me.

OK, first of all, I have to give Sanaa Lathan her props. Yea, yea, I know she's pretty and everything but up until now, she's always taken on the same type of role. The girl next door, love starved pretty girl who doesn't know how pretty she is type of role. But she really stretched herself for this one.
I must say, I had to sort of deprogram myself to realize that this was only a character that she was playing. With all due respect to Ms. Lathan, she plays a great bitch.
The film also stars two of my favorite actresses Kathy Bates and Alfre Woodard. For the first 15 minutes of the movie, I could not get "Misery" and "Crooklyn" out of my head. After that, it was a trip.
Tyler Perry pulled a Spike Lee and cast himself in the movie, but it worked. The only thing that didn't work was that god-awful wig he wore.
Don't get me wrong, there was the overly clueless character who everybody wanted to choke via Rockmond Dunbar. And my girl, Taraji P. Henson. She is so my favorite "new" actress. I say new because she hasn't been around that long, but I just like her. She's picked a lot of different type of characters and she's convinced me as all of them.
I am not going to spoil it for you but I will tell you that it is certainly an entertaining movie and I am proud of Perry. He did his thing on this one. Long story short, go see it. For real, don't bootleg it either, go to the movies, buy some popcorn and mix in some peanut M&Ms and drink a Sprite.
Go on, you owe it to yourself.