I've tried for as long as I could ...

...but I have to speak my piece.
Consider this a warning - the following is a hodge-podge of issues that have been irking my nerve all week long!
First, American Idol is working my last nerve. OK, I know that as America, we have to vote for who we want to stick around, but what about those folks who need to leave? How do we stop America for voting for the talentless, monotone singers?
I am willing to pay Ryan Seacrest to go to the call center to take the phone line that answers for that Sanjaya Malakar kid out of the wall. Don't get me wrong, he's very pretty, but that poor child can't sing. And if you watch the show as avidly as I, he's been expecting to leave for weeks. Every time they get ready to say who's leaving, he always gets this pout like he's about to start crying. That boy knows he's out of his league.
So please, America, put this kid out of his misery!
Second, how come nobody has called into question Rudy Guiliani's political background? His only experience is being the mayor of New York during the 9/11 attacks. That is certainly no small feat, but it does not qualify him to run the country. This man has no congressional experience nor has he held a state office. NYC is big, but it is a far cry from the entire U.S. Folks are getting on my nerves talking about how many times he's been married and all this crap that doesn't matter. They should talk about the experience that he has in the political arena.
Next, Anna Nicole is dead, you hear me? She's dead! Let the woman rest in piece. For God's sake, somebody order DNA from all the men she had sex with in a three month period and call it a day. And let me just say that we can rule out OJ. That baby is as white as butter and there ain't a strand of extra tight curly hair on her head.
And speaking of hair, somebody please tell Al Sharpton to get somewhere and sit his overly processed hair-having behind down somewhere! It's no secret that you're not jealous of Barack Obama, so you say, but we are tired of hearing it.
I swear man, just because he's got some white folk along for the ride right now doesn't mean they won't turn on him like week-old greens. This is still the preliminary phase of the presidential election season and Obama, Edwards and Clinton still have a very long road ahead of them.
Sharpton is all in the media talking about black folks don't trust him because white people do. That is so stoopid! And I mean just like I spelled it. Edwards, I hate to say, is running on this whole "poor people's campaign" and exploiting Hurricane Katrina victims because it will get him the black vote. Nevermind that he was nowhere near helping poor people his last time around or that he didn't go to N'awlins until it was time to announce his run.
Granted, none of the other candidates have been seen down there either, but they didn't run so they could get some votes. I'm just saying, be true to yourself first. You can lie to me, just don't lie to yourself.
And where does Sharpton get off telling Obama that he shouldn't take the "Black vote" for granted? What political candidate hasn't taken the black vote for granted? Not since the late 1960s have we given them a reason not to.
We're so proud that we get so many people of color to register to vote, but that is nothing to be proud of. Let's try to get these folks to go to the polls and exercise their right, then we'll have something to be proud of. Until then, shut up complaining!
That's it! I give up! I'm moving to Canada - if they'll have me.