Well thank God ...

... Rosie O'Donnell has finally come to her senses and will not be going after the Price Is Right gig! I don't know about you guys, but I am about ready to throw a party!
In other celebrity news, Paris Hilton was released from jail last night. Yea, I don't care either, but I thought I'd mention it.
And on the "Thank Ya Jesus" side of the law, a Washington, D.C. area judge has thrown out the lawsuit that another judge filed for $54 million for a lost pair of pants.
I am so glad that this judge has the sense to see the case for what it was and say that it was crap. He should hold him in contempt of court and send his butt to jail for wasting the courts time.
Shoot, I still can't get over the fact that he paid $800 for a pair of pants. I would think that if he could afford $800 for the pants, he should be able to afford Dryel to clean them bad boys at home himself!
That is ridiculous. If I had $800 to spend on pants, I wouldn't do it. I'd go to Lane Bryant and buy 16 pairs of $50 pants and call it a day. Anyway, let's not go there.
Last, and least, the BET Awards will air live tonight. I am not all that excited about it, but I have to watch this train wreck. I will be back tomorrow, or later tonight, with a full ... uh ... commentary about the "goings on!"

Interesting ...

... very interesting. Paris Hilton has been ordered back to jail and rightfully so, what criminal do you know gets a chance to go home on the weekend?
Apparently, she left a California courtroom screaming and crying for her mother saying, "It's not fair!" Ha, you know what's not fair? She can run around doing whatever she pleases just because she comes from money. That's not fair. She is famous for absolutely nothing. That's really not fair.
Well, I will say one thing for her, she's not blaming her legal issues on her race - unlike Wesley Snipes. In case you haven't heard, Snipes, who unlawfully claimed an estimated $12 million in tax returns, is playing the race card in his indictment.
This negro's attorneys have said in court documents that he received additional tax evasion charges while his two white co-defendants did not. Everybody say it with me on three. One ... two ... three ... "SO!"
This man makes an un-godly amount of money for every single picture he does. Look at the movies he's been a part of: the Blade trilogy, Murder at 1600, the Art of War, U.S. Marshals, a couple of Spike Lee Joints and a bunch of others.
His lawyers say that he fell victim to "unscrupulous tax advice." Now, I don't have Wesley Snipes' amount of money. In fact, I am too broke to pay attention, but I am guessing that when you have the kind of money he has, you might want to hire someone to keep an eye on your accountant.
Sounds like to me he didn't plan ahead. Obviously, he has not been well-versed in the number of celebrities who have lost their fortunes because of tax evasion. Let's go down the list, shall we? There's Redd Foxx, Peabo Bryson, Ron "Mr. Big" Isley, Don King and so many others.
He just needs to go ahead, pay the government back and keep it moving.

New plan ...

... I'm moving to Hollywood to become famous so that I can do everything I want to do whether it's illegal or not. Obviously to get out of criminal charges and jail time, all you have to do is be famous.
Don't believe me? Check the headlines.
They let Paris Hilton out of jail after serving five days of her sentence so that she could attend to some "mysterious" illness. What's the illness? According to Access Hollywood, Miss Paris has a rash.
I really hate people who state the obvious, so pardon me while I drive my point home. Had Paris Hilton been a black chick, they would have throw her some Gold Bond (the generic kind) and sent her pamper booty back to general population.
Then on top of that, they gave this chick a single cell in the special needs unit of the jail where she was being held. Why is it that the "blind" justice system can recognize that Paris is retarded but the rest of the world can't?
And speaking of retarded stars, what is wrong with Akon? In case you haven't heard, this fool threw a 15-year-old kid off a stage.
The way the story is being reported, the kid attended a concert where Akon was performing and allegedly threw something on stage. Akon allegedly asked the people in the audience to point out the person who threw something at him. They pointed to this kid, he called for him to come on stage and he threw him into the crowd, injuring another concert-goer. Now this woman has a concussion.
In the words of the legendary Richard Pryor, "That nigger's crazy."
I knew something was wrong with that dude when he came out with his first single, "Locked Up." He is singing in the high-pitched moan he calls a singing voice about being in jail.
Initially, I was a little worried about the fact that being in jail put a song in his heart. Now I'm worried that this fool might actually want to be locked up.
What about throwing a 15-year-old kid off a stage seemed right? OK, the kid may have thrown something at you. I'm thinking it's probably because your singing sounds like a sick cat on a hot tin roof. You curse him out, you don't throw him off a stage.
And what about the poor woman who was an innocent bystander? She's got a concussion all because you got belligerent because somebody hates your singing. Man, I'd hate to be the reporter reviewing his music, he'd probably hunt me down and shoot me.
I'm telling ya'll, it's celebrities gone wild and I want to be on the next episode. I got to go to Hollywood and get famous, there are a couple of people I would like to throw off of something.
What are they going to do to me? Akon didn't get arrested, so I won't either.